We’ll begin with your experience, then work together on changes that matter to you.
You don’t need to arrive knowing exactly what to say. We can begin with what’s brought you here and explore how it’s affecting your everyday life.
CBT helps us look at the connections between thoughts, beliefs, feelings, physical responses and behaviour. Together, we’ll notice patterns and explore whether ways of coping are helping you now.
We’ll explore what you’d like to be different and work on what keeps the difficulty going. That might mean questioning thoughts you take as facts, approaching things you’ve been avoiding or changing habits that help in the moment but make life harder over time.
We’ll also pay attention to how you treat yourself when you’re struggling. You might practise responding to a harsh inner voice with more understanding, learn ways to soothe yourself when anxiety rises, and begin to separate your sense of worth from mistakes, setbacks or other people’s opinions.
Change takes practice, and some days will be harder than others. We’ll find small steps that feel manageable for you, whether that’s noticing a familiar pattern, being less hard on yourself or trying something you’ve been avoiding. There’s room to talk about what felt difficult as well as what helped, and adjust things together.
The meaning we give a situation can shape how we think, feel and respond. The ABC model offers a simple way to explore that connection.
Download the ABC model ↓︎A friend hasn’t replied to my message.
“If someone doesn’t respond, it means I don’t matter.”
“I’m not important to them.” Anxiety, hurt, a tight chest, checking my phone or pulling away.
These are different ways to explore a belief. Start wherever feels useful.
A possible example of how we might explore this together.
Feeling that you don’t matter can be painful, especially when it’s familiar. We might explore how a delayed reply becomes a judgement about your worth. Checking or asking for reassurance may bring brief relief, but can leave you relying on someone else’s response to feel okay about yourself.
A different response could begin with: “This has brought up the feeling that I don’t matter. That feeling is painful, but a delayed reply doesn’t tell me what I’m worth.”
Together, we could choose a small step: perhaps waiting before checking again, while responding to the hurt with more understanding. Afterwards, we’d look at what actually happened, what felt difficult and what you learned. We can adjust the next step from there.
CBT is the foundation of my work. I also draw on Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which can help you relate differently to difficult thoughts and move towards what matters to you.
Compassion Focused Therapy (CFT) can support a more understanding and helpful response to self-criticism. We can also explore the body’s stress response and ways of feeling more grounded.
We’ll choose what fits your experience and what you want from therapy.
Explore practical resources ↗︎You can ask questions, hear how I work and take time to decide.